I was born with a loop around my neck

and even then I knew–

I will breathe in quick, choking sips

and live on in old video skips.

See,

I had wound around and into

the knot –

and held on to nots and whatnots

with fingers trying to weave

back into fists,

back into palms,

so even then I had known I could never be calm

unless

I am covered in stitched hitches

that catch every needle’s eye.